reinitialize.
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reinitializing in process.
God was preparing me all the way for this big change.
change in mounting timing, bookout frequency and most importantly whether i will stay in my current platoon or not.
i want to go my way, with my batch pple to where i get to do wat i want!
but deep down..i got a strong feeling i will not go to another platoon. i will stay.
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God promised platoon 1 rite? U desired to obey Him n to tell them about Him rite?
but i want to go my way! i want to have fun! i want to be with friends i am comfortable with!
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i struggle hard. i scream. i wince. my heart says one but my mind says another. yet both seem to mix together and conflict. argh.
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but wat if i do go to the new platoon? to be together with the pple i like? leaving platoon 1 behind?
but i dun want to go! i want to follow God's will! i want to proclaim His name as He said i will!
isnt the new platoon where i greatly desired to be in? if God gives it to me shld i not be happy i got wat i want?
i shld be happy if i go to the new platoon, but deep down i know i will be greatly disappointed. cos i wont be able to do God's work in platoon 1.
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argghhhhhh
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Lord..let YOUR will be done. let me desire YOUR will. let me follow YOUR desire. cos i know only YOUR desire will satisfy. take away the me in my life.
reinitialize.
reinitialize.
reinitialize.